While the Air Force C-5 was turning over its engines, a female crewman gave the G.I.s on board the usual information regarding seat belts, emergency exits, etc. Finally, she said, ‘Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to Afghanistan ‘ An old MSgt. sitting in… Continue reading It’s Not Your Father’s Military Anymore
Category: Humor
Prize Rooster
John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called “pullets” and eight or ten roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs. The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn’t perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his… Continue reading Prize Rooster
On the Sidelines
A wife was sitting on the living-room couch watching her favorite show on the Food Network when her husband walked in. “Why do you watch those food shows?” he asked. “You don’t even cook.” Glaring back at him, she asked, “Then why do you watch football?”
Secret Message
My husband, Michael, and I were at a restaurant with his boss, a rather stern older man. When Michael began a tale, which I was sure he had told before, I gave him a kick under the table. There was no response, so I gave him another poke. Still the story went on. Suddenly he… Continue reading Secret Message
The Capitol of Blondes
Goldie, a blonde office worker just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. So one evening she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, Tony started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with… Continue reading The Capitol of Blondes
Jumpers Anonymous
Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly. Several minutes passed… and he was back to jumping
Rules of the Parking Lot
(How many of these can you relate to?) Rule #1 – When waiting for a parking spot, stop in the middle of the road, don’t signal, and orient your car diagonally to prevent others from passing. Rule #2 – Always park on the lines, taking up as many spots as possible. Diagonal parking is preferred.… Continue reading Rules of the Parking Lot
Hearing Problem
Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said,… Continue reading Hearing Problem
Felix the Cat
My aunt’s neighbor in New York had a beautiful black cat, named Felix, who spent his days outside and came indoors at night. One cool October evening, he disappeared. The neighbor searched for him in vain for several days. The following spring, however, Felix reappeared, looking healthy and clean. She figured he’s been out sowing… Continue reading Felix the Cat
SUNDAY SCHOOL Lesson
A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc. So he asked his class,… Continue reading SUNDAY SCHOOL Lesson