With a title like that, some explanation is in order. You’ve heard them called ankle biters, or rugrats, but a new name has been invented for one of the youngest in the family. When our boys were small, it was a habit of mine to give them a nickname, just for fun, and in case… Continue reading The Vampire Toe Biter
Tag: Family
Starting a New Year and Getting Caught Up
A long awaited update. I’ve been intending to post something for a few months. Since the big Heltsley reunion last Labor Day. Well, it was actually rescheduled to September so we couled have it the same weekend as the Terry and Terry wedding. By now, the date escapes me, but I’ll bet you could ask… Continue reading Starting a New Year and Getting Caught Up
Classy Names
George goes to the Birth Registration Office to register his newborn son. The man behind the counter asks the name he wants to give to the boy, and the father replies: “Euro.” The man says that such a name is not acceptable, because it’s a currency.
Looking for a Wife at Wal-Mart
Two old guys, Alvin and Jesse, are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when they collide. Alvin says to Jesse, “Sorry about that. I didn’t notice you there. I’m looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.” To which Jesse says, “That’s OK, it must be a coincidence.… Continue reading Looking for a Wife at Wal-Mart
The Teenage Daughter Manual
Instructions for all those with teenage daughters or daughters who think they are teenagers or who will eventually be teenagers. Teenager Manual Congratulations! You are now the proud new parent of a teenage daughter. Please read this manual carefully, as it describes the maintenance of your new daughter, and answers important questions about your warranty… Continue reading The Teenage Daughter Manual
Jumpers Anonymous
Connie told her 4-year-old grandson, Dean, not to jump on the beds. After several warnings she punished him, explaining that should he fall, he would hurt himself badly. Several minutes passed… and he was back to jumping
Hearing Problem
Seems an elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said,… Continue reading Hearing Problem
SUNDAY SCHOOL Lesson
A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc. So he asked his class,… Continue reading SUNDAY SCHOOL Lesson
The Purpose of a Marriage Defines It. Ephesians 5:31-32.
It’s a mystery, but it happens every day. It’s so natural, yet so strange. Some where today, right now, a man and a woman are meeting, becoming attracted to each other, leaving the security of their families and coming together to be on their own. It’s the natural order, and design by God.
Complementary Parts, Not Equal and Opposite. Ephesians 5:30
In the big picture of God’s kingdom, and spiritual matters, where do we fit in? As Christians, we are his very own body. His own flesh and blood. In Revelation there is a mention of Christ returning on a white horse. In it we have a snapshot of his head, on top of a body that is clothed in garments drenched in blood. We are that body that is paid for, clothed, and drenched in his blood. The bride that he is coming for is the remnant of faithful ones of the body of Israel.