Things Mom Would Never Say

• "How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?"

• "Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too."

• "Just leave all the lights on ... it makes the house look more cheery."

• "Let me smell that shirt -- Yeah, it's good for another week."

• "Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I'll be glad to feed and walk him every day."

• "Well, if Timmy's mom says it's OK, that's good enough for me."

• "The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It's not like I'm running a prison around here."

• "I don't have a tissue with me ... just use your sleeve."

• "Don't bother wearing a jacket - the wind-chill is bound to improve."
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  Last Updated: 3:29 PM 10/2/2006